Not Bride-zilla

Friday, March 19, 2010

I was going to post my DIY boutonnieres post, but I left the pictures on my laptop and not my hard drive (that I carry with me).

So although I'm not at "rock bottom" right now (God forbid I get there) with this wedding -- I had a strong connection with APW's recent post. Mainly that your wedding, when you are about 2 months out, starts to become less "fantasy" and more "reality." There's the ugly work of confirming dates, tons of e-mails, and trying to figure out: HOW on earth one is going to find a home in Phoenix in the next 5 weeks, SELL furniture, MOVE out of Atlanta (with at least ONE suitcase ready for Spain), drive to Texas, scramble to find a hair dresser in the unknown land of Houston, finish wedding details (and MAYBE have a bridal shower w/Texas peeps), have said wedding, leave for Spain immediately the next day for almost 4 weeks, come back to Houston, SLEEP for a day, then drive to Phoenix and magically have a place to live.

Oh wait. That doesn't happen magically.

Like I said -- I have not hit rock bottom, but I am scared pantless I might. I connected with APW's post because being such a DIY, artsy, and craftsy person -- I'm taking on a lot. Again, that was my decision, but with both my maid's of honor being in Texas, sometimes I just want someone to force me to stop and take the reins for a second. That's the beauty of a wedding planner, I imagine she is calling you every other week to ask if your "to do" list is checked off. But right now, I'm the one asking myself if things are checked off and it gets so overwhelming.

My advice? There are friends who want to help you and are more than willing to help you. I know this because my amazing friends have asked me. The problem is there's so much to do and the offer to help is so "vague" that most brides just take the responsibility on themselves or crumble behind closed doors ... or both.

Make a list of monthly tasks and assign people to it

I made a list for my bridesmaid's of things I needed to do (such as making one person responsible of hotel research, one responsible of the bridesmaid's dresses, etc.). Your friends need delegation!

Highlight priorities and address them FIRST

I highlighted "get dress fitted" and made sure it was placed in the month of January because that task clearly needed lots of timing.

How to Help Your Fellow Bride

And for those of you that are friends of a bride -- give her your schedule! If you really want to help, don't just say "call me if you need me." E-mail her and say "is there anything specific you need to do this month that I can help you with? Mon-Wed, and Saturday's (or whatever days) are best for me."

We don't want to be bride-zillas -- but sometimes we try so hard to put a "game face" on (as APW stated), that we end up stressing ourselves out more. So, if I start panicking mid April when I'm supposed to be packed, wrapping my job up, and completing Atlanta/wedding responsibilities -- remind me that it's worth it and that it's supposed to happen! That the stress is okay, because wedding planning is hard work and not cherry-blossom-tooty-fruity stuff you might read on other blogs. And maybe... bring some Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ben & Jerry's while secretly snatching my "to do" list from me.

K? Thanks. XoXo.

***EDIT: Or have a girls' night, ask all your questions, and get them solved by your girlfriends. I had such a great night with the girls tonight and they had the best solutions/advice for my questions/concerns!! Just a quick THANK YOU to my girls!

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